Friday, August 2, 2013

Needles.Blood.And Laughs Galore! (not a queasy post btw..haha!)

I want to share with you a tid bit of my summer so far.
I did go back to the good ol' Pine Cove Ranch Camp for 6 weeks again this summer. 
LeapFrog Forever!
And again, it was a sweet time loving on my little 6th grade nuggets. I cherished every moment with those precious 32 girls. I love them all SO much! It was an amazing experience showing them Jesus and telling them that they are Dearly Loved by the Father! 
I am still processing a lot of what happened at camp, so I want to share what is going on after camp, because God is not only at camp. He is here with me and He is still working!

So, I got home from camp on a Sunday and started a summer internship the following day.
My alarm was set for 6am. I got to work at 7am ready to work. 
I remember that was one hard morning, because I was jumping into something totally new...
 and I was NERVOUS!
I was interning with a family friend at a Dermatologist's office. It is a place where they do day surgery.
Let's just say this was a HUGE change going from being with kids all the time to being with adults all day for sure. 
And it was also different, because I wasn't jumping up and down all the time, yelling cheers, counting to 8 to make sure I had all my campers, and the list goes on. 
It felt so weird to not be at camp raising the flag that morning. I wanted so bad to go back and be with my friends who encouraged me everyday and were always SO positive about life.  We lived life together for 6 weeks, and I missed them so much! 
I kept saying, "Okay Lord, show me why I am here and not at camp anymore! Do something please!"
Well, I started pouring myself into my work. I have been learning a whole bunch from all of the nurses such as how to numb-up patients, assist the doctors during surgery, how to take blood, how to talk to patients and re-assure them, and the list goes on.  It has been a wild experience.
The Lord blessed me immensely with the women I work with.  They are all so hilarious and so sweet to me.  They truly want me to succeed and understand things.  
One lady in particular has taught me more and more what it looks like to be in a deep love with Jesus.  She is one amazing daughter of the King.  The Lord sent me a person who has truly impacted my life in a big way.  I can tell she truly cares about me.  She sends me verses that always apply to my life, continually encourages me, and gives me sweet hugs when I need them (especially after I take off toe-nails at work...yuck!)  And she always provides a good laugh about 24/7! I am going to miss her so much when I go back to school. 
So as I am working day to day, I started learning that the Lord can use me not just at camp, but here in the "real world" too.  That I can impact the people around me by loving them with God's amazing love, showing them Jesus, and just listening to people and digging into there lives.
He is teaching me to be content where I am.
This sounds kind of funny, but I need to learn to share Jesus right where I am. To stop looking forwards and just be me right where I am. 
I have also been worrying about going back to school. I keep doubting my abilities and doubting God to provide certain things for me at school. 
Who am I to doubt God?
He is my everything. He knows what I need and when I need it. 
He is in the midst of comforting me about this next year. 
Don't get me wrong, I am excited, but I am also nervous about a few things.
Here is what it has boiled down to...
God walks with me in my ups and downs. He is always there. And always provides such a sweet love for me. He has got me right inside the palm of His Mighty hand! 
No need to worry. 
I've got Jesus!

Alright, I promise I will tell you all about camp, but I need more time to process. Can't wait to share what Jesus did this summer at camp. He surely did WORK!
Love you deep!



Saturday, April 13, 2013

Lindsay, Trust ME!

Have you ever been shaken by the Lord?
Where He has to yell at you to get your attention.
Right now the Lord is yelling.
"Lindsay, my sweet daughter, TRUST ME!!!"

Recently, I was denied a position next year at school. 
No, it's not the end of the world. 
But, it was a part of my plan.
Did you catch that?
It was a part of MY plan.
Dumb thing to say.
But, it wasn't God's plan.
I wanted to lead girls, show them Jesus, and love them deeply.
All great intentions, but not His plan for me in that position.
So, I sat a few days in confusion of WHY.
I wanted an answer of WHY.
I got to a place of, "What's wrong with me? Am I not good enough?"
Bad place to be, let me tell you.
Don't even go there.
I had to re-fill my thoughts with, "My identity is in Christ. I am dearly loved. I am a daughter of the Almighty King. I am His gem."
After getting my head straight, I then began to think.
I think a lot. A lot A lot.
Maybe the Lord is trying to tell me something. 
So I sat in that for a while. Just talking it through with Him and listening. Sitting in His presence. 
Here's what I got.
After not getting what I wanted, am I still going to trust in the Lord that He has a greater plan. That He is in charge and not me? That He is the only thing that matters in life? 
The Lord said, "Lindsay, are you still going to trust me, even though you have no idea what I am doing?"
Yes!

I read in Jesus Calling this week something pretty awesome, and I wanted to share!
"Trust Me in every detail of your life. Nothing is random in My Kingdom. Everything that happens fits into a pattern for good, to those who love me. Instead of trying to analyze the intricacies (details) of the pattern, Focus your energy on TRUSTING ME and THANKING ME at ALL times...I lifted you out of the mire into My Marvelous Light!!!"

I think a lot of times I look at every detail in situations such as this one, and all the Lord wants me to do is trust in Him that it will be okay, and His plans are far better than any of my own hopes or dreams. To let go of my control and give it to Him. It's not worth it.

I am reflecting now. Letting go. Trusting Him. 

I pray to the Lord that in this time I become in a deeper love for Him. I want to learn to love Him more. 

I want to leave with this sweet song.
Nothing I hold onto.
"I lean not on my own understanding,
my life is in the hands of the maker of Heaven.
I give it all to you God, trusting that you'll make something beautiful out of me.
I will climb this mountain with my hands wide open.
There is nothing I hold onto!"

This is my prayer. My cry to the Lord.